i jUST WALKED INTO MY MOMS ROOM AND THERE’S A DACHSHUND IN HERE
WE DON’T OWN A DACHSHUND????
????????
okay this dog is so sweet but where is my mom omfg
Your mom has been turned into a dachshund. It’s you’re responsibility to lift the curse.
Your adventure is beginning, my friend.
you’re mom was turned into a dachshund and your first instinct is to go on tumblr?
yeah basically
once my shirt caught on fire and my first instinct was to chat my boyfriend on skype.
(Source: mysimpsonsblogisgreaterthanyours, via bandperson)
YOU NIQQAS WANNA LEARN ELVISH?! HERE YA GO!
(via candidcatastrophe)
What if our actual lives involve saving the world with our friends and doing really epic stuff
but in this dimension we’re in someone’s high school AU fanfiction or something
well what a shitty fanfiction this is
it doesn’t even have smut
(via unusedurl)
Today I thought beans were a type of animal.
I’m going to columbia university next year.
“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
(via fishnetsandmoustaches)
I don’t give a damn about my reputation [LOUD GUITAR]
You’re living in the past it’s a new generation
[LOUD GUITAR]
[SHREK ATTACKS THE KNIGHTS AT LORD FARQUAD’S CASTLE]
[OLIVE VIOLENTLY SEWS A RED A ON HER CORSET]
she wears short skirts i prefer jeans most of the time
shes cheer captain and i am not the cheer captain, because she occupies that position on the cheer team
we cant both be cheer captain
i mean we could be co-captains but thats not what the thing says so
its okay im sure she is very talented
(via mozaikmage)
when guys are dressed in suits and they unbutton the top of their shirt and they undo their bowtie but keep it hanging under their collar and maybe they roll up their sleeves a bit and their hair is all disheveled and
boys
(via breakmyreedbreakyourface)
people that regularly go to sleep before 10 pm
- ????
- ????????
- ???/
- ??????????????????
- ?
- how
